The Classics never die.... They just get dark.
Who misses "KABLAM!"?
In the unlikely case you never had a childhood or lived under a rock, KaBlam! (stylized as KaBLaM!) is an American animated sketch comedy that ran on Nickelodeon from 1996 to 2000. It features a collection of short films in several different styles of animation, bridged by the characters Henry and June, who introduce the shorts and have adventures of their own in between. It had many greats, like Sniz and Fondue, Action League Now, Prometheus and Bob, Life with Loopy, The Off-beats, and often or less some very random once seen cartoons. I missed them so much, I wished they continued to this day, even if some actors would have to be replaced, I would watch this show!
I am sad, in fact, disgusted that Season 4 ended on 9 FREAKING EPISODES?! The show died before it had a chance. Thanks a crap, Nickelodeon?!
But, however, my perspective was changed the day my uncle got a rare DVD of KABLAM from a shady person from his workplace, where the DVD is said to have the missing 10th episode. At first, I was excited, a lost episode?! God smiled on me this day?! But then.... Well, I, simply don't know what to say.
Sniz and Fondue: Revenge of the Sting!
I played the episode and, something was, strange. The intro was, different. Except of random stuff being thrown at your face, we quickly came to the comic. and the comic front page itself was...Strange...Instead of things that have anything to do with the show, it had what looks like, an unsettling image of a Jack O Lantern.
The comic's cover?
I hopefully assumed it was another Halloween special. WHY else would that be there? Anyway, when Henry and June appear, they didn't do a dance. They just.....Stood there. Henry was completely normal, but June, was emotionless. Henry greeted the audience as usual, but June, wasn't herself. Something felt, unusual. I don't think I should continue the episode, but at the same time, I can't help it. This is the first time I can watch a new episode of something that ended in 2000.
June remained silent, which made Henry concerned. Henry wanted to know what was wrong, but June stared angrily with evil eyes, and a sinister grin, almost similar to the Jack O Lantern's! Henry said no word, and took the forth wall page to a Sniz and Fondue episode. It was called, "Revenge of the Sting."
I was surprised. Sniz and Fondue ended in Season 3. I didn't think they would come back! The intro was normal, but then, the house was in samples. It looked like a monster destroyed their home. Sniz and Fondue's family was murdered by, some beast. It was horrid. Then, there was Sniz and Fondue cornered, by a Scorpion monster. It looked similar to the Scoripian they bought once, but, it was monsterious! Sniz and Fondue were screaming as the creature grabbed them and quickly killed them! WHAT THE FUCK?! The short ended quickly with the sounds of the Scorpian eating as the iris faded onto it.
Action League Now: Flesh's Funeral.
Henry shared my shock. He was confused to what happened.
"Hey! THAT WASN'T IN THE SCRIPT?!" Henry shouted!
"That wasn't how the episode was suppose to end?! WHAT HAPPENED?!"
"I happened."
Said June, who stood wickedly and smiling malevolently as she hold rope. She pounces on poor Henry and tied him up! June laughed as she beaten the unprepared boy!
"At last! My revenge on Nickelodeon shall begin?!" June shouted!
Revenge?
"What Revenge?" Henry asked, before he got slapped!
"Revenge for planning to cancel us before our prime?! We had such potential, and Nick wants to just, dump us so they can "Look at the future", PFFT?! And we have no place in it?! ARE THEY HIGH?! Well, I'll teach them lesson! Time for the cast members to face due retirement, Henry boy?!" June said, as she then grabbed the the page, and shown Action League Now.
It skipped the usual intro and instead got right into a funeral service....FOR THE FLESH!? The characters revealed that Flesh died during a battle against the Mayor, who used a death ray to destroy him and the under bed HQ. But then, the Mayor quickly appeared with a hair blower, which since they're obscure toys, I guess this was the death way, I mean, a fan was a wind machine in one episode.
The Mayor said his usual evil rant, as he turned on the death way hairblower, and melted the characters. The reminder of the Action League, and the Chief. Melted to melted toys. even then, it was, unsettling somehow. We get a scary close up to a now demonic Mayor!
Life with Loopy: The White Faceless Man.
There was only a brief scene with June laughing evilly. She then grabs a page, and turns it to a seemingly normal Intro of Life with Loopy. Oh no, not sweet Loopy. Then the Title card was, of a skinny, faceless man.
Instead of Larry introducing the story like he does, It was him and Loopy walking in the woods. Larry was trying to talk Loopy out of doing what she was doing in collection suspicious, bad drawings. Loopy ignored him. Eerie music played as Larry began to panic. Loopy was brave and determined. She found the last of the bad drawings, as Loopy was too distracted by the drawing. She then heard Larry scream! She turned around, and Larry was gone.
Loopy called out for her brother, but go no answer. before she could take a step, a tall, white, faceless man appeared, then suddenly static, then the short went blank!
Prometheus and Bob: Tape 0.
We didn't even return to June this time around, we skipped to what is a normal intro of Prometheus and Bob... But no Narrator. When the mock government segments played, it just played with no introduction from the Narrator. It was of.... Prometheus, doing, horrible experiments on Bob and the Monkey. He was doing annual probing, dissection, all kinds of despicable, cliched alien things to them. Prom was laughing victoriously, as he was freed from a bad burden! Then came the Commander who saw this. He appeared in a rare selection of episodes. He looked as if he, approves of this.
A cut later, Prometheus and the Commander eat the brains of Bob and the Monkey. Ugh, why?! Poor Bob! I even feel sorry for that Damn Monkey who normally torments Prom!
Suddenly, the cartoon prematurely ended upon showing June, who grew eviler and eviler.
But then, she grabs another page to the next cartoon: The Off-Beats
The Off-Beats: Rapey Groo.
I was surprise this Cartoon made a return as well. It prematurely stopped when Mo Willams went over to Cartoon Network to work on Sheep in the Big City. There wasn't even the intro, it showed, oh god.
It was of Grubby Groo, raping and torturing Betty Ann Bongo, Tommy, Rapunzel, August, even Tina and those asshole populars. September was lying dead in blood. This, this is awful!? The short was shorter then normal, and ended before I saw something else!
June's Encore
Then, there was June being at her sinister worse. Her face was completely like the face. Henry was dead, stabbed by a sword.
"I hoped you enjoy the last show ever. You will no longer have us to kick around anymore, now that Nickelodeon has forsaken us. Now, It's time for my encore. Nighty-night, folks." June said.
June brought out a chainsaw, and used it on herself! Blood was everyone, and drowned the entire stage, as evil laughter was heard! the last thing that was seen was the comic closing, and burning into a fire.
That was exactly what I did afterwords, I burned the DVD and any evidence of it! I cried for weeks. What was the horror I seen. I felt more sad for my favorite show then ever. June only did this because Nickelodeon betrayed them. Everyone suffered what because of them. Corpbrete greed caused June to do, horrible things. I may never see the show the same way again.....Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go back to crying myself to sleep, morning the loss of my favorite characters, and their lives and/or sanity.